There are millions of people in the world who have experienced the heart wrenching pain associated with losing a baby, and despite that, it's still quite a hushed topic. That's why I will always support any 'break the silence' cause. I know this is my second blog about this topic in a short space of time, but I hope you guys don't mind, and understand that it's just something I'm passionate about.
This week, The Miscarriage Association are asking people who've experienced a loss to say thank you to the people who supported them. I immediately wanted to be involved, so I grabbed my notepad and started thinking. I thought I would do a video talking about my experience and end it with my #sayingthanks, or maybe I'd just take a photo holding up a sign, both of which I might still do, but for now I wanted to write. I knew I wouldn't struggle to find something or someone to be thankful for, but what I maybe wasn't ready for, was the amount of things I found I was thankful for.
So here goes...
To the people who supported me in one of the worst times in my life, thank you for:
Being there.
Letting me cry. And scream. A lot.
Being honest and telling me you didn't understand how I felt, but you knew it must have been awful.
Trying to understand.
Telling me it wasn't my fault.
Making me feel less like a statistic and more like a person.
Sharing your story with me. I know that can't have been easy for you.
Listening.
Sitting in silence with me.
Bringing me hideously fattening comfort food.
Making me tea. Tea makes everything seem better.
Giving me cuddles.
Driving hundreds of miles just to give me cuddles.
Allowing me to grieve.
Giving me time.
Giving me time.
Giving me hope.
Giving me tough love.
Being gentle with me when I needed you to be.
Letting me hide away when I wanted to.
Helping me face the world when I was ready to.
Bringing me vodka, or wine, or both. Then drinking it with me, or not drinking it if I didn't want to.
Helping me come to terms with what had happened.
Helping me to understand.
Helping me to help others in similar situations.
Supporting me in every way you possibly could.
Remembering the anniversary of my miscarriage and acknowledging it as something that I needed to mark, even as the years go on.
Giving me the confidence to open up and share my story.
Understanding that having my beautiful rainbow baby, however grateful I am for her and however much I love her, it doesn't lessen the pain of losing a baby. And knowing that that is one of the hardest and most conflicting feelings to have.
Being the most amazingly supportive family anyone on this planet could wish for.
Being the perfect definition of the word 'friend'.
Telling me it was going to be ok.
Telling me it was going to be ok.
And to the (very few) people who didn't support me at all:
Thank you for making me a MUCH stronger person. Your hurtfulness taught me to never treat people the way you treated me.
#sayingthanksBLAW15
Xx
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